Posted on 5.19.08 at 9:30 am
Yesterday I was leaving church and (of course) had to make a pit stop in the ladies’ room. My church is relatively small and I pretty much know everyone, but there was an older lady in there that I hadn’t seen before. She smiled and asked if this was going to be my first child and I told her that it was actually going to be my third. She was congratulatory and all the rest, and then started asking how I was feeling, etc. Anyway, somehow I ended up telling her that I worked full time and that’s where the conversation went down hill… She immediately said “OH. You work.” And that’s when I knew where the conversation was headed. She then went on to say “People usually get angry with me for saying this but, I don’t understand why women who work have children. It doesn’t make any sense that you would leave your child with a stranger. My husband and I were married 14 years, until he passed, and I am proud to say that my children never spent a day in anyone else’s care.” And on. And on. Of course I’m paraphrasing based on what I remember, but you get the gist. She even went on to say that she knew of a woman who had a baby and returned to work after 6 months. She told the woman “Well, what was the point of having a baby if you were going to leave her after 6 months?” She also said that “if every woman did what the Bible said and took care of the home like she is supposed to, she would not need to work.” Yup. She did. So at this point I’m deciding whether it’s worth defending my position, or if I should just be polite, smile and leave. It was odd because on the one hand I don’t necessarily disagree with her. On the other hand, I wanted to explain to her that all women don’t always have the luxury of not working outside of the home (not to mention those who just choose to). So I basically told her that, while she was blessed to have been able to stay home with her children, not everyone can afford to do that and that just because a woman must work doesn’t mean that she should not experience the blessing of having children. I didn’t want to be rude (even though I thought that she was rude), and I left it at that. She said that she would “pray for me” that one day I could stay at home with my children. I thanked her and got out of dodge. Sheesh. Next time I’ll just hold it until I get home.