MamaLaw: Evidence for Our Insanity Plea » Book Reviews

My Total Mom Makeover

justicefergie — Tue, 16 Nov 2010 18:55:23 +0000

Last week Justice Ny and I attended the Bounce Mom’s Night Out event in D.C. hosted by the lovely Jennifer James and MBC. The event was geared to moms wanting to simplify and de-stress their lives (me! me!). The food was amazing, as was the company, and the massages, but the real treat for me was meeting Hannah Keeley and her teenage daughter.

Hannah is a homeschooling mom of 7 (!) who by the way, looks totally great, at peace and happy. She’s also a life coach for moms, published author and TV show host. At the event, we got the chance to ask Hannah some questions about how she manages her family and household. She started off the discussion by giving us some background, beginning at the point when she was overwhelmed, exhausted, overweight and generally miserable. Interestingly enough, she started feeling this way once she had her third child.

Basically, she was me.

You may or may not know from my brief that I underwent a mini-breakdown sometime earlier this year. I’ve been feeling exactly the way Hannah described for many months. Of course some days are better than others, but for the most part, I’ve been feeling like I have no control over my life. I don’t have control over the forces that require me to go to work; I don’t have control over the hours in the day that never seem to be enough to get all of things required of me done; I can’t keep up with my kids’ schoolwork and commitments; I’m too tired and have no time to exercise…you name it and I feel like I have no control over it and am stuck in an endless cycle.

So Hannah’s experience struck a chord with me. And I was excited to see that each of us was sent home with a complimentary copy of her book: Hannah Keeley’s Total Mom Makeover: The Six-Week Plan to Completely Transform Your Home, Health, Family, and Life.

It’s exactly what I needed. I started reading it and doing the exercises that very night. If I can end up looking and feeling like Hannah (and with my kids as well-adjusted as hers), then sign.me.up. I’ll let you know how it goes!

Image credits: MomBloggersClub.com and Amazon.com.

Finally Figuring it All Out- Raising My Spirited Child

Justice Jonesie — Sun, 07 Mar 2010 18:11:00 +0000

I’m really into audio books this month and have gotten books on everything from love to parenting. (Okay, really I only got two books, one on love, one on parenting; haven’t made it past my first two books.)

The first book I listened too was Raising Your Spirited Child by Mary Sheedy Kurcinka. This.book.is.awesome! I was at my wits end with both of my boys. Youngest is non-stop emotional roller coaster and full of more energy than all three of my children combined. It takes him two hours to fall asleep at night, even when he’s exhausted. He is also happy go lucky one second and then crying desperately the next- just because his paper airplane didn’t fly “the right way” or because his pants make too much noise when he walks so he can’t wear them.one.more second.longer. Frankly, my patience was wearing thin with him.

Oldest, also Mr. Moody, but in a different way. He just gets so upset about things at a much deeper level than most eight year olds should (and this has always been the case with him at every age). Everything with him is a battle; homework, going to taekwondo, doing homework (oh yeah, said that), his frustration with his games, toys, even other kids his age. And sometimes he says things that are so deep- like he’s just too smart for an eight year old.

My way of handling these boys was to count down the minutes before bedtime and pray that we all made it to bed without me spinning my head around like Linda Blair in the Exorcist.

ENOUGH!

With all three of my pregnancies I always had the latest baby book on my nightstand and would read every single line like it was the Bible. And then it was all different nursing books. My education stopped there. I realized one day that I needed to be just as proactive about parenting as I was about weaning the kid off the boob. I had no idea what I was doing- duh.

The Spirited Child was a savior! My boys are definitely spirited children. A spirited child is a child that typically is characterized as more than a handful- to put it nicely. Not your usual handful but like a double dose of extra work that makes you want to take a stiff drink just to deal with them. They are usually more aggressive, wild, temperamental, and energetic than your average child. And they can also be more persistent, sensitive, moody, and intense than most children. The more is not just sometimes, it’s all the time.

There are generally two types of spirited children – the extrovert and the introvert. My youngest is my extrovert, and my oldest is the introvert. This just adds to the fun of it all for me, of course, because dealing with each requires different strategies.

After listening to the book I’ve learned how to identify ways to make it a good day while also preventing the triggers to make it horrible day; I learned to diffuse blow-ups; learned how to select my battles; identify the positive in having a spirited child; and most importantly, I know what I’m doing now! Before reading the book I doubted everything I did with my boys, felt guilty for the way I felt about them, and the way in which I communicated with them. There were many days in which I was so drained from being around them I felt like years were being taken from me daily. Not only was it draining me but also draining Daughter- often she’ll lock the boys out of her room just to get some peace and quite.

When I popped in the first CD, I swear, Mary was talking to me. It was as if she had been watching home videos of the madness going on at my house and decided to write me my own how-to manual. Over the years I’ve tried to read other books but never felt like the recommendations would work in my house. This was just the right fit.

If you struggle with a child that is “more of everything” I encourage you to read her book. It will definitely change your relationship with your child in a positive and healthy way.

Tune in on Wednesday for my next review- The Power of Love, by Dr. Laura Schlessigner in which I write about all the stupid things covered in the book.

Have a great week!

The Help

justicefergie — Sat, 14 Nov 2009 03:22:00 +0000

I just finished (literally just finished) reading The Help by Kathryn Stockett, and I just had to post. You must read it. It’s one of those books where you’ll let the laundry pile up, the kids stay up until 10pm, and throw a frozen pizza on the table for dinner, just so you can keep reading. The gist of the story is that of a twenty-something white woman in 1960′s Mississippi who grows frustrated of her empty life as a “society” woman; living only for bridge club dates and Junior League meetings. She has a deep-down desire to be a writer and decides to write a book on the most controversial topic there could have been at the time: race relations in the South. Her angle on the issue is unique, however. She asks the black maids of her unknowing friends if they would share their stories of what it’s like to work for white families and the adventure begins.

I don’t want to give the plot away, so I’ll stop here. Kathryn Stockett is phenomenal and her characters jump off the page. You’ll find yourself thinking about them even when you’re not reading.

Of course there has been some critcism of the book, seeing as how she is a white woman partly writing in the vernacular of black women in the ’60′s South. I will admit that I was taken aback by that in the beginning. But once you realize what an honest and respectful job she does of honoring her characters, it quickly becomes apparent what a gem this book is.

*This is a purely independent book review! I saw it at the bookstore, bought it and loved it. The end.

Jonesie’s Reading List

Justice Jonesie — Fri, 26 Jun 2009 15:14:00 +0000

There is nothing like reading a great book that you just can’t put down. Reading is one of my favorite things to do and I’ve been an avid reader since I was a little girl. When I was about 9 or 10, I started to compile a handwritten list of all the books I read. The list included how long it took me to read the book, a rating (stars), page numbers, and author. I was passionate about updating my list and reading a book in 1-2 days. My brother, who is four years older than me, loved to make fun of me for this. Reading was on his list of things not to do. I remember once leaving a book I was in the middle of reading in my desk at school. I left it at school on a Friday and was devestated when I looked through my bag and realized that I left my book. I started crying and my brother had a field day making fun of me for this for years. Brothers.

When my list got to 12 handwritten pages, I decided to retype the entire list on our home typewriter. This was way before every day people had computers at home so I sat there with the typewriter at the dining room table and started typing. It took me hours, days, weeks, to finish it. I can only imagine what my parents thought.

Though I haven’t updated the list in over 20 years, I still have my handwritten version and the typed up version tucked safely away in my box of memories. Every now and again when I read a great book I am tempted to add it to my list- just for fun. Who knew I was such a little geek? Shh, don’t tell anyone.

In tribute to my list, here are three great books I read recently that you too must read. Have you read them, if so, what’d you think?!

1. Firefly Lane by Kristen Hannah (Cried like a baby but it’s a happy book that will have you thinking about growing up as a young girl, your journey through motherhood, life long friends, and life as you know it.)

2. Gods in Alabama by Joshilyn Jackson (Loved it- funny, witty, and full of surprises- just like Joshilyn’s blog. I can’t wait to read the next book.)

3. The Color of Water by James McBride (Two amazing stories in one. You’ll read the story of McBride’s Jewish mother who raised 12 biracial children in the 1930s and beyond paralled with McBride’s tribute to his “Ma.” If you loved Richard Wright’s book, Native Son, you’ll love this too.)

Enjoy them, they are all excellent reads.